Galileo was wrong? – Holy Fucking Shit You're Dumb!
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Galileo was wrong?

This one has been making the rounds recently.  A bunch of Catholics are putting on the “first annual Catholic conference on geocentrism”.  Entitled “Galileo Was Wrong:  The Church Was Right“, they plan to present scientific evidence proving the validity of an Earth-centered universe.

Now, let me just explain, first of all, exactly what they are claiming.  In case it wasn’t clear or you thought I must have mistyped a whole bunch of words up there in the first paragraph, what these people are saying is that they can prove–with SCIENCE!–that the Earth is the immobile center of the universe.  That it doesn’t turn on its axis, it doesn’t orbit the sun, and it doesn’t move around the center of the Milky Way along with the rest of the solar system out here in the Orion spiral arm.

Of course, the first item on their agenda is the little matter of how no scientist worth a shit will actually claim geocentric theories are valid.  In the lecture entitled “Geocentrism:  They Know It But They’re Hiding It”, the speaker will evidently pass around a bong before letting you in on the great secret of the world:  The fact that scientists fucking love lying to people.    It’s the same line of bullshit all conspiracy nuts use.  “The Man” knows the truth, but he keeps it secret for reasons nobody can ever articulate.  That’s why you need the bong–to open up your mind to the facts.  And the fact is (apparently) that all that pesky science you’ve been taught about how the Earth orbits the sun is completely wrong.

After that, they’ll get into their own “evidence” proving the Earth is the center of the universe.  I’m sure their scientific evidence will end up boiling down to “God said so”, because there’s really nothing else to say on the matter.  Who knows what evidence these people have to support these claims, but I figure enough bong hits and nobody will care anyway.

The really crazy thing about this is that it’s a Catholic conference.  Usually the real nutcases are fringe Protestant sects, with their “young earth creationism” and anti-evolution stances.  Mainstream Catholics, on the other hand, believe what science tells us about the age of the universe and of the Earth, and even believe in evolution, albeit a “theistic evolution” that still leaves a role for God.

This just proves the old adage that there is not a belief so crazy that you can’t find somebody supporting it.

Posted in Miscellaneous.