Go to hell, Todd Akin and company – Holy Fucking Shit You're Dumb!
Skip to content

Go to hell, Todd Akin and company

So, by now you’ve heard of Todd Akin, and what a colossal piece of shit he is and all that. I feel like I missed my chance to jump on that train as it was leaving the station because I was super busy not writing blog posts for a few weeks.

But today I discovered something else appalling. Todd Akin aint the only shitheel who actively believes women don’t get pregnant from being raped. Apparently, lots of people, people in positions of actual power, believe this.

Now, I’m no doctor or anything, and my public school health education was spotty at best, but I’m pretty sure I learned somewhere along the line how babies are made. It involves sperm, ova, and the two meeting up somewhere inside a woman’s lady parts. And, near as I can tell, rape involves all three of those things. So… why wouldn’t that tend to cause pregnancy, at least at a rate on par with consensual sex?

The answer appears to be equal parts magic and victim blaming. The magic comes in the form of made-up bullshit about female bodies having some here-to-fore unknown to science ability to prevent pregnancy in cases of rape. Hey, guess what? That’s not the case. There’s no magic “secretions,” and Jesus doesn’t appear to make any real effort to stop rape pregnancies as far as anybody can empirically discern. So that’s out.

So what you’re left with is the stomach-churning implication that “legitimate rape” doesn’t cause pregnancy, which of course means, hey bitch, if you got pregnant, you weren’t actually raped. You must not have fought hard enough! Or maybe you secretly enjoyed it, you whore! Couldn’t have been rape, though, because you got preggers.

That’s some straight-up terrible bullshit douchebaggery, right there. I’m not sure I can think of a worse thing to say to someone who just got raped and now found out she’s pregnant with the rapist’s child.

The fact that people actually believe this is painful, but unfortunately, not surprising. Who was it who said that thing about repeating a big lie so often people eventually come to believe it? Oh right, it was these Nazi fucksticks.

Go to hell, fuckers.

Posted in In The News.