Yeah, it’s that dingus John Edwards. One-time Democratic nominee for Vice President and former Presidential candidate. He’s finally admitting that the child his mistress gave birth to in early 2008 is his.
In case you don’t remember (or didn’t care–and I can’t say as I blame you if you didn’t), Edwards’ infidelity was a hot topic during his brief stint as an also-ran during the 2008 Democratic primary season. Well, as hot a topic as can be expected when it involves a dude who had no shot at winning the nomination. He and I won the same number of primaries, as I recall.
Cheating on your wife is bad enough. But Johnny’s wife also has incurable cancer, so he’s like a double shithead for cheating on a dying woman. Seriously man, that’s just low. Fuck you.
But here’s the real thing. Why on earth did you get your mistress pregnant? That’s like the dumbest thing in the world. This isn’t the friggin middle ages here. We have pretty reliable methods of birth control. Wrap it up, dumbass! At least Clinton was smart enough to pull out. Nothing good can come of getting your mistress pregnant. There’s no upside to that at all. This has already ruined him politically, and now will likely ruin him financially as well. Not only will he have to support (and rightly so) his child, he’ll likely have to give tons of money to his ex-mistress, and it wouldn’t surprise me if his wife finally decided to stop standing by her man and took a big chunk out of him in a divorce settlement.
And it couldn’t have happened to a shittier guy! Sayonara, asshole.
We should have a “which John Edwards is the biggest asshole” competition, pitting that dude against vowel-buying champion this fuckface.
I think it’d be a close race. And a race politician John Edwards might actually have a chance of winning for a change!