Gnomes stolen. Film at 11. – Holy Fucking Shit You're Dumb!
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Gnomes stolen. Film at 11.

Ok, more like 10, since that’s when we have the local evening news around these parts.

So somebody stole more than 100 garden gnomes from the front lawn of an Arvada, CO woman.  Here’s the crazy part.  She still has plenty left.  More than one hundred gnomes were stolen, but she still has like fifty left!

“You can’t have anything nice anymore,” the woman said.  I think she’s implying garden gnomes are nice.  Here’s a hint, ma’am:  Your neighbors got tired of those freaky-ass eyesores and paid some kids to go chuck them in the river.  It even says in the story that “none of her neighbors saw a thing.”  Of course they didn’t!  The were all conveniently looking the other way.

What is it about tacky-ass shit like garden gnomes?  Why are some people totally into them?  Man, they creep me the hell out.  I’d not want to live next to that lady, for sure.

Posted in In The News.